I walked into the washroom at work this morning and saw a girl I didn't know. I looked again and it was me! It was my reflection in the mirror and I have straight hair.
I had this brain-wave last night that I would straighten my hair just for the hell of it. What an ordeal. First I had to have a shower (not such a big deal), then I had to blow dry my hair and straighten it with a brush. Holy crap. It took 45 minutes and I really just looked like a pine tree with going through an identity crisis. My plan was to dry it last night and use the flat iron this morning to do the finishing touches. However, if I wanted to make it to work before noon that plan had to change. So, I plug in the flat iron and crank the heat in hopes it will speed up this process.
I would like to take this opportunity to say that I hate doing my hair. That should explain the state of my hair most days. In fact, one of my life mottos is "If I can't see it, then I don't care". How does this fit in with my hair most days? I can't see the back of my head so I don't care what it looks like. This motto also explains the ass shelf that is my posterior.
Have you ever hear hair scream? I think I have. I'm pretty sure my hair was screaming in agony as I mercilessly ran the super hot flat iron over it again and again. I pinned up my hair and fried small chunks at a time. All in all it took me 30 mins to complete the act of torture. I pulled it into a loose ponytail went to bed.
Fast forward to this morning. Obviously, I didn't shower this morning because of the hair straightening adventure. So my day is already "off" and I feel abnormal. Onto the hair! I plug in the flat iron to do some touch ups. My hair strands see me reach for the iron and recoil in horror...almost curling back up again from the shock, dammit. I spend another 20 mins straightening the hair doing touch ups.
Now, here I sit at my desk with straight hair. Was it worth it? Uh, no. All in all I spent over an hour and a half on my freaking hair. I absolutely cannot imagine why anyone would do that on a regular basis. I could do so much more with my time....like sleep. Oh well, I don't think it's going to be an issue again for a good long time anway. I'm pretty sure every strand of hair on my head would hop out and drop to the floor in protest if I ever try that stunt again.
7 comments:
lol - you crack me up :) and I can *totally* relate!! I hate my hair, it's very unruly - and I don't even have very much of it!! I do flat iron it - but only only on special occasions - like when I go to the mall ;) gawd my life is pathetic! I did find this great stuff called (quick trip to the washroom to check! lol) Smooth Down by Redken - it is and I quote 'a protective smoother for very dry/unruly hair' I must say that it feels like putting baby oil in your hair - but it really feels nice afterwards and it does help! soooo if you want to attempt it again - you might want to seek some out...maybe I could mail you some!
HAHAHAHA!! Guess I got the good hair genes. Takes me less than 5 mins to blow dry AND flat iron straight.
Sarah you always crack me up - it is like I am right there with you every time - has anyone ever suggested you become a writer??
I feel your hair pain, my friend. I too am cursed with the not quite straight, not quite curly hair. It takes too much time and effort to get it to go either way. Which is why my hair is in a ponytail of bun most days lately.
You failed to mention the fact you look so diff today that at daycare this AM my 4 year old said:
"Sarah....(long pause) I like your hair flat".....(tee hee)
lol--too funny! I look like a moron with straight hair! Too much time fo rme!!
I hate doing my hair. I was a tomboy and even in junior high I couldn't get my bangs to do what all the others girls were doing with theirs. The effort just wasn't worth the outcome. As I got older I got even more lazy. Now I just wash it and let God style it the way He wants and leave it at that.
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