Bingo Shutters!

That is actually the name of JJ's stuffed dog. But to me it sounds similar to "Jinkies" like Velma says on Scooby-Doo. Just imagine her saying "Bingo Shutters, it's the witch's ghost! Run!" Okay on to bigger and better things.

JJ just had her first major freak out, meltdown whatever you want to call it. The kid was nekked and out of control. I was washing her hair and we were being silly and trying to get it done really fast. In my hast, I made the critical error of changing the routine. I forgot to let her smell the shampoo and dip her nose in it before I put it in her hair. She was pissed. I quickly put some in my hand and let her smell it but she was already well on her way to a category 5 meltdown. I quickly rinsed her hair and tried to calm her down but it was useless. So I drained the tub and walked out her her while she through a fit. I let her go for about 5 minutes and went back into talk to her.

This time I tried the whole use your big girl words, what can we (she and I) do to make her feel better, I'm sorry your upset but this is not acceptable thing. She heard "Blah, Blah, Blah..." Her response to me was to bend down and scream in my face with all her might. Fun. So I lifted out out of the tub and took her to her room. I took her out of the tub for fear she might split her head open when it started to rotate on her shoulders and vomit started to spew from her mouth. I tend to fall down when that happens.

Now in her room, she is beyond pissed...she if flippin' livid. I mean livid. So she hits me. I pull out a chair and calmly tell her she is in time out for hitting. What does she do? Shoved me with 2 hands as hard as she can. As little patience as I may have sometimes I have to say I keep my cool with her. I set her back in the seat. I put herback in the chair a few more times before she has had enough of that crap. She launches a full on assault. She is kicking, punching and hitting me with everything she has in her. I'm still calm telling her she cannot hit and that she is having a time out for hitting me. At this point she hears nothing. She has lost all sense of control. She has snot running down her face and is screaming like I'm sitting on her and ramming baboo shutes under her fingernails. Oh, while I'm telling her she is is time out she is screaming "Tubby, I want back in the tubby!" I swear she sounded only partially human. She got away twice and threw herself in the tub. Like any good parent, I locked the bathroom door. At this point, I was seriously concerned she would hurt herself in the wet, slippery tub.

I left her in the hallway and walked away form her. Clearly even the sight of me was completley infuriating the child. I walked away from her to give he a minute but she followed and decided to kick the shit out of me again. I felt I had no choice but to take something away form her. Enter Bingo Shutters. I took Bingo Shutters. The child is no longer acting human after I did that. In hindsight, I'm not sure that was wise choice on my part because it just made her angrier. But really, I was at a loss at that point and she was kicking my ass. She child is over 40 lbs and 42 inches tall. FYI - Eric is not home. She went completely ballistic. Five minutes earlier I would have thought it impossible for her to be any angrier - I was wrong, very, very wrong. I tried to deal with her for another few minutes and then called my mom. I was still calm but the child needed someone and I was clearly not that someone. By this time it was going on 45 minutes.

My mom arrived and calmed her down a bit. In the end, she just wanted her Momma. She and my mom talked about the incident when I was out of the room. When I came back in JJ says "Momma, if you are angry you should just say I need to go to my room to calm down." LOL...it was cute. Hopefully, she'll remember her own advice. I explained to her that I was not angry with her at all. Her answer? "Oh"....it as if she thought "Well, shit you should have told me lady."

Anyway, we are buds again and everything is fine. She is sleeping. I weathered my first real out of control episode. I'd love to think this was the one and only but somehow I doubt it. Although my mom did say I never did anything like that...so there is hope.