Friday, May 26, 2006

Just Call Me Schleprock

My husband calls me Schleprock because I do stupid thing all the time and I'm somewhat accident prone. I've blown 3 televisions just by turning them on, sometimes computers will work for other people but not me (this has been confirmed by one of the IT guys in my Dept), I've been known to break bank machines, I'm the girl who spills my bright blue drink on your white carpet. I think you get the picture. In addition to my clumsiness, I'm also incredibly lazy. I will find the easiest way to do things, I'll ask other people to do things for me, and I'll even just wait to see what happens to avoid doing things. This brings me to last evening's incident.
Around 6:30 pm, I drove to the convenience store to get milk. I parked in the garage when I home and as I was going in the house, I noticed the car was not in the garage far enough. I closed the garage door anyway thinking that if the car was too close to the door, the sensor on the door would stop it from closing. I stood there and freaking watched the events unfold because I was too damn lazy to just move the car further into the garage.
So the door comes down and just when I thought I was in the clear I hear a sickening scraping and a thud. The door scraped the back of the car on the trunk. I quickly close the door to the house so Eric doesn't see or hear what is going on. I go look and the trunk has scratches that look like a bar code about a foot long. I quickly decide how to handle this. My options are 1) run like hell, 2) lie somehow 3) tell him what happened and succomb to the relentless teasing, 4) shut my trap and develop a plan over night. I go with #4.
This morning he walks past the trunk 3 times and I am crapping my pants because I still haven't developed a plan yet. When I got to work I told my awesome supervior about the incident and he came out to take a look at it for me. Incidently, he is an all around great guy and awesome boss... and not just because helped me out. He said the scratches could probably be buffed out. I said great tell me what to do. He suggested that I shouldn't tackle the job myself. Good idea given my dumb ass, screw up tendencies.
I took the car to the Nissan dealership and told them of my covert operation and they agreed to take a look for me. My new best friend, Chris, says he'll have it buffed out for me in 5 or 10 mins and he'll take it in right now. Fantastic! I'm wondering if I'm going to have to sleep with him to afford this repair but whatever. 10 mins later Chris comes back and shows me the repair. He did a great job! I then go inside to find out the financial damage. Guess what?? They didn't charge me a penny - woo hoo!! Now, I openly admit that I do use my girly charms on men on a regular basis to get things accomplished. I used my feminine wiles this morning but my intentions were just to weasle my way into getting it fixed today. I fully expected to pay for the repairs (see above - wondering if I would have to get jiggy with Chris). I told the guys, Chris and the 2 men at the service counter, that if they weren't going to let me pay then I was getting them coffee and I wouldn't take no for an answer. I got their coffee orders and hit the Tim's drivethru. Three coffee and 12 donuts later I return to the dealership to deliver. One of the guys, said "You're sure taking good care of us today." I gave them my best "secret weapon" smile and replied "Like wise! Have a great weekend!" and left.

Hehehe....The Princess strikes again.

Update - I told him. I was soooo proud of my accomplishment that I told him. Cripes, someone is going to get the jiggy jiggy out of me today as a result of this adventure.

2 comments:

NickyT said...

LOL - You never cease to amaze me!! You forgot to mention that the car is NEW! That Eric & You just got this said car!

I think you are a natural blogger! You silly girl!

We just have to get Mel going!!

Queen Mel said...

Well now, what do we have here?

Proof! Proof of this fiasco - a great blackmailing piece (if ever I may need it) - picture me: slanted eyes, rubbing my hands, evil cackle (sounds more like a witch than anything - whatever!

Eric would freak out if he knew, which makes this story 10 times funnier. The fact you used your feminine wiles to get what you wanted - does NOT surprise me one bit, they work for you very well. Plus you covered your butt for the next car fiasco you have - coffee and donuts (and a pretty young thing to boot)? Those men will never forget you, if you smash the car to smitherines they will fix it for you and probably for nothin'.

You claim your clumsy and have bad luck, but I've never met someone like you who has the power to create her own outcomes to repairing them. You always seem to come through these mishaps smelling like a rose and nobody is none the wiser..........You truely are a "Princess"......and a great writer of blogs I might add!